When you create a new user control, you could use a dictionary with the tag value as key and the control name as value. Then you can access the control directly by using the IndexOfKey method.
Dim NewForm2 As New Form2
Dim ControlIndex As New Dictionary(Of String, String)
For I = 0 To 2
Dim NewPanel As New WindowsControlLibrary2.MyCustomPanel
NewPanel.Name = "Panel-" + I.ToString
NewPanel.Location = New Point(0 + (NewPanel.Size.Width * I), 0)
NewPanel.Tag = "MyTagValue" + I.ToString
ControlIndex.Add(NewPanel.Tag, NewPanel.Name)
NewForm2.Controls.Add(NewPanel)
NewForm2.Update()
Next
NewForm2.Show()
Dim CurrentPanel As WindowsControlLibrary2.MyCustomPanel =NewForm2.Controls(NewForm2.Controls.IndexOfKey(ControlIndex("MyTagValue1")))