Here's what I've settled on for now, until something better comes along:
<TextView
android:id="@+id/player_name"
android:layout_width="fill_parent"
android:layout_height="wrap_content"
android:ellipsize="end"
android:maxEms="4"
android:maxLines="2"
android:text="testing thisout with extra sauce"
android:textSize="18sp" />
combination of fill_parent, ellipsize END, maxEms and maxLines gets me close enough.