It seems you can attach function to events, like pause
and return false to prevent anything from happening. Would that work? I can't really test it.
$(".flowplayer:first").bind("pause", function(e, api) {
return false;
});
http://flowplayer.org/docs/api.html#section_jquery
Or maybe something like:
$(".flowplayer:first").bind("play", function(e, api) {
$(".fp-play, .fp-timeline").unbind("click");
// Other controls and events...
});