You could try this tutorial for writing a TCP server using OTP principles: http://learnyousomeerlang.com/buckets-of-sockets#sockserv-revisited
If you use a gen_server instead of your connect loop, you can store the Pids in the state. Then you can use gen_server:cast/2 to send a message to one of the Pids.
The function you want to send a message to the client from the controlling process is gen_tcp:send(Socket, Message), so for example if you wanted to send a one off message on connection you could do this:
user(UserSocket)->
gen_tcp:send(UserSocket, "hello"),
case gen_tcp:recv(UserSocket, 0) of
{ok, Binary}->% Send basic message.
gen_tcp:send(UserSocket, "basic message"),
{error, closed}->% operation on close.
gen_tcp:send(UserSocket, "this socket is closing now"),
end.