While I don't agree with your perilous vendetta against proper typography, I can tell you that you will need a str_replace()
for each of the different kinds of apostrophe-esque characters that there are. Just do a bunch of str_replace()
s with each kind of apostrophes you want removed.
I still think you are trying to solve a problem by avoiding it rather than solving it. Apostrophes are perfectly ok to put into a mysql database, it might just need to have a different character set or collation.