I've had a similar issue with ExtJS in the past while trying to load very large grids. Let me just say at the outset that it's certainly not their fault - 50,000+ records is just way too much data. To get around this problem I resorted to using paging.
Have a look at their documentation for a paging toolbar.
Here is an example.
My only other suggestion would be to use an infinite grid, but write a file conversion wrapper over your XML data to convert it to JSON.