I don't know of any in the languages you specify, but here is one in ANSI C (mscgen) and another Ubuntu package (msc).
Another approach that might work for you is to filter your large pcap file using something like ngrep. It supports regular expressions, and I wish I had known about it earlier. If it can filter the packets you need, then you can use wireshark to generate diagrams on the filtered results. I just found another tool in the same vein called flowgrep, but I haven't tried it myself.
EDIT: Just found a tool that accepts descriptions in the same format as mscgen and renders them via javascript: mscgen_js