On the .NET forums, this question has been posed before.
Q: Are there any approaches to get the Internal Reference Count without decrementing it?
A: There are no class library methods that can provide this service.
Q: If it's impossible to get the Internal Reference Count without decrementing it, Is there any way to increment its count after calling Marshal.ReleaseComObject()
?
A: Again, there are no class library methods that provide this service.
They do have an awkward way of achieving this as a workaround with global APIs exported from your COM server.
Details here: http://social.msdn.microsoft.com/Forums/vstudio/en-US/9de651e0-ad3c-44be-8855-3dc13673ac73/how-can-i-get-the-internal-marshaling-count-of-an-rcw-systemcomobject?forum=clr
Other than that, looks like you are stuck. Hope that helps you.